Susan Martin aka CoCo Cheznaynay® Secret Agent of Truth & Style™. This is a real life story of how small thoughts make big change. This is so powerful a creation, some do not remember my real name – just CoCo.

I needed courage to be me so this is what I did … I liked the name CoCo – it is fun, strong and a joy to say. What I did not have the courage to say or own in my life, I quoted CoCo. This started slowly but every time I said her name, people laughed so I decided to trademark the name. When you start paying attorneys, it all becomes real. Then I started adding more to her story. Now she is writing mine …

Who I was (or who they told me I was)

Born Susan, but called Susie – then to be serious and professional, I went back to Susan with the strength of Martin through marriage – the name was strong but not the marriage ———- but I never felt like a Susan.

As Susie, I learned it was not ok to be me so I studied others. I heard what they said and watched what they did – it did not always match. I learned “Happy, grateful, glad” because other emotions were not allowed – I learned to sublimate, I was told I was fortunate but I felt in the way. My parents married so old for their time, we actually skipped a generation. They were so grateful for my brother and me, they were overprotective. Since I was not given the information to make intelligent decisions, I learned to blame.
So the lesson looking back was Sublimate!

Once I found cigarettes, alcohol and drugs, I sublimated my feelings and the fabric of who I am, I showed the world bright, busy and murky patterns and colors. And, I learned life to be what I thought it was to be instead of accepting what is.

After treatment, recovery, loss and pain, I quit smoking. I tried to learn to be very assertive and began a collection of cowboy boots to help me ask for what I needed. Then everything I ever tamped down came back to the surface. With no more coping mechanisms, I was raw and experienced a clinical depression. The last thing depression will allow you to do is to own it – it wants to own you, to tell you are not worthy, you have failed and that trying is futile. But I wanted happiness and did not want a life of manipulation, victimstance and blame.

While I was so concerned that life was not what I wanted it to be, I realized this: If you live your life in expectations or preconceptions, you will miss all of the beauty that happens in the moment.

So I got real and remembered:

I always liked secret agent characters. They made it acceptable to know you have to act like someone else to complete your mission. They also had cool gear with dual purposes, hidden messages and secret compartments.

With this unusual way of relating my feelings through story and a unique sense of style, CoCo starts to emerge. I wanted to share what I was learning and people confided in me cause I made them feel comfortable. This made sense.

Think about the energetic importance of your words – especially your name.

In CoCo’s World, names are very important for they set our intention and define our potential. CoCo is prejudged because of her name and her unusual style. A Change Agent disguised as a quirky fashion plate, while being judged or ignored, her original intent of being fun and flip, although true, allows her Mission of infiltrating and inspiring all to face their fears and own all of who they are. Not another mentor can disappoint me for I have my own and she knows she is not perfect but she has courage to try.
So what is in the power of a Name? Maybe it’s your destiny, your shyness or your might. If you have a fun name, we will repeat it a lot. Or maybe you were ridiculed because of your name and did not want to break with your tribe so you kept a name that did not feel like you. Through marriage you can see the power of a name change – for better or for worse.

CoCoCourage is certainly there when I summon. This is not to take away from Buddha, Jesus, God or angels but, for me, I could not see a gold belly, sandals, blinding light or wings in my car or in my meetings. I needed a take-along visualization of a Style Iconic, Attitude Apparent Secret Agent /Super Hero who does TaiChi and understands when she stands sideways, places Shields Up or moves her hair, she is protected from words or energies projected. And she has some pretty powerful friends, too.

I needed courage to be me so this is what I did … I liked the name CoCo – it is fun, strong and a joy to say. What I did not have the courage to say or own in my life, I quoted CoCo. This started slowly but every time I said her name, people laughed so I decided to trademark the name. When you start paying attorneys, it all becomes real. Then I started adding more to her story. Now she is writing mine …

It was to be a brand of home, travel and fashion products with secret compartments, hidden messages and dual purposes. But it was more about developing your own sense of style and finding yourself; having CoCoCourage to tell the truth and not be willing to be safe, beige or sublimate.

Then it happened – CoCo turned to teach me…Who I thought would be my audience, I would become and see if I could follow my own advice.

I took scuba lessons and realized I had overwhelming performance anxiety. I had to face this or I could not progress with Coco – this was “My Midlife Awakening” instead of a Crisis. To experience that much fear, work through it and then experience that much beauty and peace was the greatest gift I knew I was to teach. I was writing and designing products CoCo would offer, then another lesson.

I invented a now patented product, by accident, as what I thought was a creative gift for facing a fear I had. This has taken me away from the original idea of just CoCo writings and products but the lessons I am learning are what I was originally going to teach. Even the literal lessons of manufacturing teach me lessons and to go into another market of which I have no experience and do it anyway.

In the meantime, I am trying to get back to the original purpose of CoCo but I am so distracted by survival – aren’t we all?

Your name

When we meet, we all want to know how much energy to invest in others so we sort and assume based on what we see and perceive. In the beginning is the word and the word is our name; our first intention of identity – the intonation, the level of confidence, the flavor.

Does your name give you what you need or are you stronger because of it?

Such as Les, Bud Hoyle, Harry Butt …..

Or do you have a name that can used as a literal verb or adjective to motivate you and others – like Susanna Sway? The repetition of S’s – sweet; even the cadence is pleasant and has an ease about it. I think we could all be swayed by Susanna Sway!

I make up code names for the people I meet but I also pay close attention to the energy of real names. I had a client whose last name was Fabricant – and she couldn’t. I have a client named Haight but she is quite pleasant after all because I kept an open mind….

What do you Need?

Strive to feel resonance with your name or instead of changing your name, you can develop your own persona or Secret Agent name to give you the qualities you need to operate in your life.

When we choose to not react from our ego or who others perceive us to be, we can be very effective at learning and distancing ourselves from the fray. But sometimes to develop this stance, we may need a little help from an identity we can develop.

What do you need? Influence, Peace, Courage, Truth?

Tell me your name …